I saw the movie, “Inside Out 2” recently. As you may know, it’s a story of how our emotions interact inside of us to create our external choices and reactions. In this sequel, the new character “Anxiety” starts to run the show more than all other emotions. With Anxiety at the helm, our previous protagonist, “Joy,” is pushed to the side. In a moment of exasperation, Joy says, “Maybe this is just what happens when you grow up…you feel less joy.”

Ooof. I felt this. And I was not alone. There was an audible gasp from the adults in the theater. 

It got me thinking about joy, and the ways it gets sidelined while other emotions take charge. Fear, anger, sadness, worry, apathy…these emotions are heavy, and we spend a lot of energy carrying them around. 

What the heck is joy anyway? Whereas happiness is often sparked by something external and fleeting, joy is more of a way of being. It’s a mindset that comes from intentional daily thoughts, feelings and actions.

I was particularly inspired by, “The Book of Joy,” in which the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu come together to discuss this elusive topic. One of the things they come back to over and over is the power of compassion. It’s not only about giving this kindness, empathy and grace to others, but also learning to give it to ourselves. 

When we shift into this compassionate mindset, we loosen the grip on our expectations, and therefore, open ourselves to noticing and experiencing more joy.

How many times do we judge and criticize other people without knowing them? Those judgmental thoughts are coming from our assumptions, which often come from our own deep fears and insecurities. Shifting our thoughts to include more curiosity and compassion can be a game changer.

Our thoughts drive our emotions. If your thoughts are judgemental, your emotions will correspond. You’ll feel suspicious, angry or afraid. And as a result, your actions will come from a place of fear and distrust. If you infuse your thoughts with kindness, love, and curiosity, what kinds of emotions and actions will correspond?

Replacing judgemental thoughts with kind thoughts, allows permission for people to be imperfect. And when we offer that grace and kindness to other people, we become more able to do it for ourselves. Creating more lightness and levity in our lives is a natural invitation for joy.

As I write this, I’m processing loss and grief. I’m feeling sad and angry, which is making it tricky to embrace more joy (hence my deep-dive on this topic). I recognize that most of our suffering is connected to us wishing things were different than they are. Clinging tightly to expectations of how I think things are “supposed to” be, rather than finding peace and contentment in my current situation is the toughest practice for me. I suspect it’s tough for you, too.

Which is why it’s no surprise that the Yoga Sutras specifically call out this uncomfortable human experience. The Niyamas, which are internal guidelines for living more ethically and spiritually, name Santosha as one of those internal practices. 

Santosha invites us to be content with what is, without trying to change it. Not focusing on what’s missing or what could be better. Not relying on things outside of ourselves to make us happy. But rather, finding gratitude and acceptance in what is. 

Believe me, it’s easier said than done! But loosening your expectations and beginning to embrace what’s in front of you is one of the most powerful steps to inviting a mindset of joy. 

Here are tips for cultivating joy during your yoga class: 

1. Come to your mat with curiosity and kindness. Notice when you’re judging yourself or wishing something was different.
2. Quietly (or vocally!) send kindness and support to the people around you. See and appreciate their unique contributions. Being part of a community accelerates joy!
3. Take time to laugh at yourself. Notice when you’re taking yourself too seriously.
4. Be humble and willing to learn. No one is expecting you to be perfect, so loosen your grip and embrace your stumbles.
5. After class, don’t dwell on what did or didn’t go well on your mat. Simply appreciate the experience for what it was.

How do you cultivate joy on and off of your mat? We would love to hear about it!